Sell With Empathy: Mastering the Platinum Rule for Unbreakable Customer Connections

April 22, 2025
Sasha Leitao

Chapter 9

“Treat others the way they want to be treated.” — Sell It Like a Mango, Chapter 9

When you’re pressed for quota, it’s tempting to default to The Golden Rule—pitching the way you like to buy. But buyers aren’t carbon copies of you. Donald C. Kelly’s Platinum Rule flips that script: tailor every touchpoint to the customer’s own style, priorities, and pace. The payoff? Faster trust, smoother closes, and relationships that outlive a single deal.

1. From Gold to Platinum: Why the Upgrade Matters

  • Golden Rule: “I’d want a brisk demo, so I’ll give them a brisk demo.”
  • Platinum Rule: “They need a deep dive and time to think—let me slow down and provide detail.”

In today’s crowded inboxes and shrinking attention spans, relevance is currency. The Platinum Rule turns empathy into a competitive edge.

2. Build a 360° View of Each Buyer

a. Decode Their Communication DNA

  • Clue in their emails: long paragraphs = detail‑oriented; bullet lists = brevity lovers.
  • On calls: do they lead with stories (big‑picture thinkers) or pepper you with stats (analytical minds)?

b. Map Their Buying Priorities

  1. Risk‑averse vs. innovation‑seeker
  2. Price‑sensitive vs. value‑focused
  3. Solo decision‑maker vs. consensus builder

Document these traits in your CRM so your entire team speaks the same “buyer dialect.”

3. Active Listening: Your Platinum Superpower

Kelly stresses listening to understand, not to respond. Try his “3:1 rule” on discovery calls: for every three sentences they speak, you get one to clarify or dig deeper. Use phrases like:

  • “Tell me more about…”
  • “How does that impact your team’s targets?”
  • “What would success look like six months after rollout?”

You’ll surface unspoken fears and aspirations that generic reps miss.

4. Personalize in the Moments That Matter

  1. First outreach: Reference an article they shared or a challenge they disclosed on LinkedIn.
  2. Demo: Rearrange your slide deck so their hot‑button feature appears first, not buried at slide 17.
  3. Proposal: Mirror their preferred format—Excel model for number crunchers, one‑page visual summary for creatives.
  4. Follow‑up: If they’re email laggards but quick on Slack or WhatsApp, adapt channels accordingly.

Small signals of adaptation shout, “I get you.”

5. Empathy After the Close—The Loyalty Multiplier

The Platinum Rule doesn’t stop when the contract is inked.

  • Onboarding: Customize training speed and depth to match user comfort levels.
  • Check‑ins: Schedule them around their peak season, not your calendar.
  • Expansion opps: Frame upsells in terms of their evolving goals, not your quota gap.

Delivering value on their terms turns customers into case‑study champions and referral magnets.

6. Avoid the Platinum Pitfalls

  • Assuming sameness: One CFO’s concise style ≠ every CFO’s. Validate preferences individually.
  • Monologue mode: If you’re talking more than 60 % on calls, revert to questions.
  • One‑size tech stack: Force‑feeding your favorite channel can alienate chat‑averse execs.

Stay curious, stay flexible.

Real‑World Snapshot

During a slow month, Kelly noticed two buyer personas in his mango stand: habitual tasters who asked many questions and quick snatchers who valued speed. He created two micro‑experiences:

  • A tasting corner with flavor notes and pairing tips for tasters.
  • Pre‑packed “express bags” for snatchers.

Sales jumped, lines shortened, and customers felt understood—because they were.

Key Takeaways

  1. Empathy = Revenue. Understanding personal preferences accelerates trust and decisions.
  2. Listen, then adapt. Active listening reveals the roadmap for personalization.
  3. Consistency wins. Apply the Platinum Rule from first touch through renewal to cultivate loyalty.

Your Next Move

Choose one live deal and schedule a 15‑minute “pre‑call empathy audit.” Note the buyer’s preferred pace, depth, and channel. Then redesign your next interaction to match. Measure the response—you’ll feel the Platinum difference immediately.

Because in sales, platinum isn’t just a precious metal; it’s the standard that turns strangers into superfans.

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